Life is hard, and those lucky enough to have had a good childhood are more likely to find contentment as adults. However, even some women who grew up in happy situations can still fall into toxic behavior cycles that threaten their long-term happiness.
A recent post is asking ladies to expose their worst flaws, and hundreds of honest women are stepping forward. Here, women share moments when they realized they were the toxic ones in a relationship.
1. The Past Catches Up
Our past trauma never leaves us, but we can alleviate the pressures it brings through self-reflection and therapy. “It was through uncovering my early life traumas and then seeing how my adaptations to those traumas played out in relationships,” concedes this honest lady.
2. Behaving Like Ex-Partners
Another summary forthcoming in this thread claims that “defense mechanisms” manifested in certain situations are her problem. She admits her toxicity came to the fore when she would use “reactive abuse tactics in non-abusive situations.”
3. Hindsight Is Always 20-20
“I had this mind and soul-exploding moment of realization,” states a woman who broke up her relationship, “of how I had contributed to the ending, of how I had changed, and the challenges I must have presented.”
4. Rinse and Repeat
When your relationships all turn sour, maybe you are the problem! This narrative fits a woman who says she kept pursuing toxic partnerships before conceding that she was just as much to blame. “I realized it was because I was too ashamed to admit I was part of the problem,” she says.
5. Being The Manipulator
Guys out there can sometimes reach a breaking point with manipulative girlfriends, so this story will be familiar. Another honest reflection came when this lady could see what she was doing to her partner. “I was being manipulative to “test” how trustworthy or honest my SO or friends would be,” admits one forum member.
6. Project Much?
“I’m a firm believer that anyone giving advice is really just giving advice to their past self,” says one community member in response to another’s admission of this behavior. Do you ever find yourself giving advice you should be following? If that’s the case, you are projecting your own issues onto others, which can be catastrophic in relationships.
7. Home Truths
Most women don’t consider themselves liars, but compulsive lying is a self-defense mechanism for some. One response in the discussion is candid. “I was lying to get a desired result,” explains a commenter, “and when I recognized it as manipulation, I got out of the relationship soon after.”
8. Fists of Fury
The honesty in this discourse is refreshing. One girl in the thread recognizes how she is violent, has problems with fidelity, and has a history of substance abuse. Understanding this is toxic, she says, “They all deserved better, and I’m all alone now.” I hope she can find someone one day.
9. Running Away From Confrontation
Countless people share how they cannot tolerate hearing boyfriends lecture or expose their conduct. A particularly awkward encounter details how one woman would refuse to listen to her partner and leave the room mid-sentence. The moment she realized this was wrong? “It was a while after I left,” she confesses.
10. I’m Not A Mindreader
Irrational people can be taxing — whether they are men or women. However, some girls state how angry they get when their partners are not telepathic. “My bf just texted me that I’m stressing him out because he feels like he has to read my mind constantly,” acknowledges one girl in her current relationship.
This thread inspired this post.
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